Are You Effin' Kidding Me?

We waited four months for the commander of our armed forces, General David Petraeus to speak to Congress, and for what? To get the party line: "give us more time...?"

The much-anticipated first day of testimony from Petraeus, a decorated, four-star, Princeton-educated warfighter, turned out to be so much gobbledegook. In essence, all we've heard is the same thing we've been hearing for the last year and a half: that the consequences for leaving Iraq are greater than the risks inherent in staying.

And isn't it ironic that his appearance -- in full "Class A" uniform -- comes today and tomorrow, the sixth anniversary of the terrorist attacks on the United States.

And isn't it also interesting that Osama bin Laden made a guest appearance on video a few days ago? Speaking of the terrorist mastermind, where is he? Oh wait, we know where he is: Pakistan. He can FedEx in a video but we can't capture the man responsible for over 3,000 deaths in the largest case of mass murder in US history?

Yet, we have all the time in the world to run around ancient Mesopotamia and Sumeria trying to kill insurgents, people who just want us to leave their country.

But I digress.

"The military objectives of the surge are in large measure being met," Petraeus said. While improvements "have been uneven" across Iraq, violence levels after the surge have so far been below those in 2006. But what he failed to mention was that 2006 was a banner year for violence in Iraq, worse than the preceding two years. So basically, violence is still endemic and still out of control; we just won't be setting any new records this year. That's a hell of an accomplishment.

And of course, Iran is at the root of the evils in Iraq, so says Petraeus. How did we know that was coming? According to the general, Iran, through the use of its Revolutionary Guards' Quds Force, intends to fight a proxy war against the Iraqi state and U.S. forces in Iraq.

Of course, we should have seen it! It's the Iranians are making our lives miserable in Iraq.

Yeah, right.

The whole point of their appearance has been "we need more time."

Time for what? To start the next war in the middle east? To get more deeply mired in a civil war among people who haven't been amicable to one another for, oh, a millennium?


"There will be no single moment in which we can claim victory," said Ambassador Ryan Crocker, also in D.C. to speak to congress. He was also quoted as saying that any turning point will be recognized only "in retrospect."

So we'll have to review history, when? Five, ten. fifteen years from now, to see the "turning point" Iraq? No. We know the turning point today. It was the day George Bush was inaugurated, since he wanted to go to war and planned for that conflict with Iraq from Day One.

Well, the Brat-in-chief got his wish.

And this is what we get when the "adults" are running the show?

Do you remember when Bush took office after the contested election of 2000, when all of his personnel were saying "the adults are now back in the Oval Office..." Really?

All I can think of now whenever I see anyone from this administration is the Comedy Central's "Lil' Bush," with Lil' Condi, Lil' Rummy and that unintelligible, foul-mouthed bastard, Lil' Cheney. A bunch of impetuous former "un-cool" kids who, as adults, want to impose their will on everyone else around them. Now they want to be sandbox bullies.

And for Bush, Iraq is a pretty big-assed sandbox.